The Storm before the Calm
by treetrust
Summary: Justin has broken up with Ethan and Brian wants nothing to do with him, will Brian change his mind when he hears how Justin once came to his rescue or will he be angry that the blonde has been keeping secrets from him. Story is complete.


_Please note I do not own anything to do with Queer as Folk._

_I know I am late joining the world of Queer as Folk but I have only just finished the series and I absolutely loved it!_

_This is my first every story I've written, I have a few unfinished stories about Queer as Folk that I would like to finish and publish but I have no idea if I'm any good at all this so please comment and review. I welcome all positive comments and constructive Criticism. _

_I always wondered why they never made a bigger deal of how Justin helped Brian out with Kip Thomas in the series, I was then one instant where Justin was the one who came to Brian's rescue and I thought they should have shown Brian's reaction to it._

_I also wanted Brian and Justin reuniting after Ethan to be a bit more dramatic so I have decided to take a shot at writing it myself. I hope you enjoy it._

Brian's POV

I searched the menu again and tried to decide what to order for lunch at the liberty diner but it was no good I couldn't concentrate.

Fuck I was agitated.

I knew it was this shit with Justin that had me all on edge, I frowned as I remembered our encounter from the night before. I wasn't shocked that Justin had made an eager attempt to try and get me back into bed or the backroom at Babylon at the very least. I had been waiting for it since I heard that he had broken up with the idealistic violinist, if I was honest I had been waiting for it since the day Justin left me.

I wasn't being arrogant, that was just how life went. Young queers and their visions of love and ideas of marital bliss, it was a farce and an impossible dream which they all found out sooner or later and Sunshine had learnt the hard way just like everyone else. I had seen the breaking signs in the love nest before Justin had even realised they were there. Even if Ethan hadn't helped things move along faster with his hunger for musical fame and glory Justin still would have gotten bored, he might think its love and monogamy he craves but he's young and doesn't know any better. I however know him very well, I know that he loves the excitement of the game as much as I do.

Well maybe not as much as me, I'm not sure anyone could match my enthusiasm for the single life but it still gets Justin going, I can see it in his eyes when he spots his next target, his hunger, his lust. I quickly erase the image of the young blond from my mind when I feel the familiar stirrings down below.

No it wasn't Justin's suggestion that they _'went somewhere quiet'_ that was playing on my mind, it was my shocking response. I had never turned down a fuck with someone I found attractive in my life and if I was really horny then finding them attractive didn't even need to play a part. In my eyes everyone was game, except for Mikey but he was the exception not the rule and you could probably add Ted and Emmett to that list but for different reasons to Mikey. Knowing their personalities in depth meant it would be hard for me to get it up for them let alone fuck them. With Justin however this had never been a problem in fact the more I got to know the kid the more I found himself wanting him, although I would deny it to anyone that asked.

So why the hell did I turn him away when he was pressed up against me and offering himself up on a plate?

I took myself back to last night when Justin was standing so close that I could smell the shampoo in his freshly washed hair, the kid had always used this shampoo his mum brought for him that smelled like oranges, I had grown fond of the smell in our showers together.

He had moved even closer and whispered in my ear "Have you missed me?"

Had I fuck? Every day I had missed that mop of blond hair in my bed but I would rather die than admit that.

"No time for missing Sunshine, too many distractions, too little time" I watched the kid sigh as he let the comment wash over him like he usually did.

"Then come with me and let me show you what you've been missing" Justin had whispered seductively.

That had gotten a '_rise_' from me and I couldn't wait to use it show Justin what HE had been missing but the lie was out of my mouth before I even realised I was going to say it.

"Sorry sunshine, I've already got someone on the way to be serviced, in fact I'd better be heading off" even though the truth was I would be heading home to an empty loft that would stay that way for the rest of the evening. Justin had looked momentarily wounded before regaining his composure.

"Maybe another night then?" He had offered tying to conceal the hurt that he must have felt at my rejection.

I cringed as I remember my parting line "Sorry Sunshine, no time for all the new tricks if I keep re visiting the old ones" And with that I walked away and didn't look back. Not that I needed to look back to know the kid must have been crushed, I had felt completely shitty about it myself.

In all honesty I was desperate to have the blonde back between my legs, so why the sudden game playing? I wanted to take him then and there so why didn't I?

_'Because he hurt you' _the thought jumped into my mind but was quickly dismissed, Ha! Brian Kinney doesn't get hurt, you would need a heart for that and any resemblance I had to a heart had turned as black as the night years ago.

_"You hurt when he left you"_ …...No not hurt, I might have been a bit off for a few days, punching Mikey being exhibit A and I'll admit that I missed fucking him and often pretended that I was with him when I was fucking random tricks and yes I did hire that guy that looked a little like Justin to play with a couple of times but I was hardly crying myself to sleep every night.

Did I want to feel like that again?

Well…. No.

Shit was that it? Did I not want to go there with Justin for fear of him walking out on me again?

It couldn't be? Why would I care if some plaything moved on to the next guy?

_"Because this one was different" _Fuck this, it's doing my goddamn head in.

I glanced up aggressively at my dining companions.

"Where the fuck is my fucking lunch?" I growled.

"It might speed things up a little Brian if you actually ordered something" Ted teased loving seeing me out of sorts.

Shit I hadn't even ordered? I caught Mikey's concerned stare and knew that I had to get the hell out of there.

"Fuck this, I'm off. I'll catch you tonight at Babylon" I stormed out without waiting for their replies, what does it matter to me if they're there? I plan to find my own company anyway.

The second I walked into Babylon I felt the heavy beat of the music instantly start to wash the shitty day off me. I spotted Mikey, Ben, Ted & Emmett over at the bar and decided to join them before I got down to business. My mood was improving dramatically by the second.

"On your own Brian?" Ted started as soon as I reached them. I smirked refusing to lose my good mood.

"Not for long" I winked as Ted rolled his eyes, ahh Jealously is a sad sad thing.

"In fact Teddy, I'm just about to go shopping. I would ask you to join me but were not in a Bargain store and I'm not sure your body can afford much else" I glanced at his companion "No offence Emmett" Emmett just glared at me but Ted jumped straight in with a reply.

"Just stay out of the kids department" I laughed, it was a quick comeback, I was impressed but he was gonna have to do better than that.

"Now why would I do a thing like that? Its buy one get one free, maybe you two could share the one I don't want?"

Bored of the bantering and missing the limelight, Emmett jumped forward in front of the group.

"Well boys, this dancing queen is in need of some tunes, Teddy care to join me on the dance floor?"

With that he flounced off towards the dance floor with his lover in tow.

"What the hell is up with you? You're like an emotional yo yo these days" Ah Mikey always wanting to have the 'serious' talk no matter where we were.

"What do you mean? I'm fucking fabulous!" I assured him and to highlight the point I signalled to a hot guy walking past to give me 5 minutes, he instantly understood that our meeting in 5 minutes was to take place in the back room. Trick number 1, signed, sealed and delivered.

"Smooth" Mikey commented.

"Not bad for round 1 but for round 3 or 4 I really like the prime heavyweights!" I grinned down at my best friend and watched his face break out with my favourite smile, the one I think he saves just for me.

"Come on Ben, let's dance. Brian's is about to start warming up and we don't want to get stuck as his sparing partners" Ben laughed and followed Mikey to the dance floor. I watched them for a couple of minutes finding my mood improving at seeing Mikey so happy.

Well….… time for round 1 I realised.

I felt him before I saw him, I felt the hairs go up on my arm and I knew it was him. I looked around cautiously not wanting to seem like I was looking for him. I spotted him in the centre of the dance floor quite a way away from the rest of the guys, they hadn't spotted each other yet. The trick waiting for me in the back room was pushed to the back of my mind as I quickly raced up the stairs to get a better view of Justin without him being able to see me. He was dancing with a pumped up gorilla type, this guy was twice the size of Justin and yet I still would have put him as the bottom in this pairing. Justin looked delicious, he was wearing a tight fitting red T Shirt and black combat trousers, fuck I was getting hard just from watching him dance. I stared at him intently and seriously considered if it was possible that I really was too scared to be with him again. Each time I went to bed with him I grew a little more attached, I wasn't so much of an idiot that I didn't recognise that. It wasn't love or anything as ludicrous as that but I definitely liked having him around and if I allowed myself to get used to that feeling again then I was just setting myself up for the fall for the second time. I know Justin preached about wanting to settle down but he was so young that I knew he would want to experience so many different guys, Justin was so full of life he was bound to get bored easily and if I let him back into my life how long until he got bored again? Or found a new obsession? And then I would look like a pathetic loser once again. I glanced back at the dancing blonde and made my decision not to open old wounds. I would just have to avoid Justin until my wanting him died down a little, there were so many young things I could use to pass the time with, some blonde, all of them beautiful and eventually Justin will move on to his next target. I get now that he never really cared about me in the way that he kept banging on about, I was his first obsession, his first everything, he was bound to grow attached but as soon as he became more self-aware he moved on. He wants me now for the thrill of the fuck, he always loved that with me, that I do know! But what would be just a thrill fuck for Justin could end up being a dangerous game for me.

No it's decided! I am never fucking Justin Taylor again.

I slowly started to wake from my deep sleep and the first sensation I felt was the pounding in my head. Fuck. The worst thing about getting old apart from the getting old part was that the alcohol and drug hangovers were getting worse and lasting longer. I reluctantly opened my eyes and prayed that my memory was right and that I had kicked last night's entertainment out before I fell to sleep.

Ahh an empty bed, thank god. I was not in the mood for his non-stop talking. He had been dark haired, 6"1 and not bad in bed but the guy didn't shut up and I hadn't wanted him here a second longer than necessary.

I glanced at the clock and sighed it was time to get up, I was meeting everyone in the diner for Breakfast, Lindsay and Mel said they would stop by with Gus because I hadn't seen him in a couple of days. I smiled at the thought of seeing the little guy, he was the only other male who had used his cheeky grin to get under my skin, no scrap that, Gus was the ONLY one and always would be. With the thought of Justin being pushed to my mind once again I started feeling apprehensive about meeting everyone for breakfast, would he be there? I never knew in these situations, I was aware that they were technically my group of friends or as close as I was ever going to get to friends but Justin was so damn likeable and persistent that everyone had grown so fond of him and considered him just another member of the group. I also suspected that some had already come to care for him more than they would ever care for me, mainly Melanie and possibly Emmett but that was ok I wasn't going for friend of the year award anytime soon and I liked it that the kid had people he could lean on and turn to if needed especially if I planned to keep my distance from now on.

Anyway I had no idea how anyone would handle situations like these, I knew that Debbie and Lindsay loved seeing Justin but I like to think that I mean as much to them if not more than the kid so would they continue to include him in their plans or would they think they needed to save my feelings and try and limit the amount of social events they included him in. I hoped that wasn't the case, I wouldn't want Justin losing his friends just because we wasn't fuck buddies anymore, however seeing him all the time wasn't going to help my 'stay clear' resolve. Arranging to meet in the diner was always going to be difficult because there was always that risk of him working that day and his presence was unavoidable. I used to know his work schedule inside out but I've noticed some changes recently so I can't be sure anymore when he's going to be there and when he's not.

I hoped he wouldn't' be there today, I just need one day's peace without the blonde invading my every thought.

I found myself enjoying Breakfast, Justin was thankfully absent and Gus was the centre of attention in the diner, every hot guy that came in paid attention to Gus and then paid a little more attention to the proud father, I was loving it. Ted, Emmett, Mikey and Ben were also in good moods and everything felt like old times.

My good mood however was not made to last when I saw a familiar gentleman walk through the door. No it wasn't the blonde I was avoiding but Kip Thomas a man who briefly worked for me before wrongly accusing me of sexual harassment which almost cost me my career. Despite dropping the case before it got that far the guy still made my blood boil.

"For fuck sake" I cursed out loud causing everyone to turn towards the door.

"Who's that?" Mikey asked confused.

Melanie, who was my lawyer during the case recognised him immediately and answered for me after correctly assuming that I was too angry to talk.

"That's that asshole who accused Brian of Sexual harassment after Brian made it clear that he wouldn't give him a fast ride up the career ladder just because he had bent over in Brian's office and let Brian have his wicked way with him." I sighed, only Melanie could sound like she was defending me while offending me in the same sentence.

Mikey however always had my back and shouted out to his mum behind the counter.

"Ma could you tell this gentleman that he should eat elsewhere in future, he's the asshole that accused Brian of sexual harassment"

Kip realised we were talking about him turned in our direction noticing me for the first time since walking into the diner.

"Brian Kinney….. Fuck me" He at least had the decency to looked shame faced and I felt myself regaining my composure, I even managed to smile at the fucker.

"No thanks, been there, done that and it was definitely not worth a repeat performance."

I saw Mikey roll his eyes at my ability to joke about such a serious subject but it was seriously all I could do to stop myself from standing up and punching the shit out of the guy.

Kip seemed to accept the fact that he was grossly outnumbered and chose not to respond to my little dig and instead said something completely unexpected.

"Whatever you say Kinney just keep that little Blonde psycho away from me"

I frowned in confusion "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Oh don't play dumb Brian, I'm talking about that dirty little trick you played on me. Sending that hot piece of blonde ass to hit on me and then when I'm on my knees with my mouth full he starts talking about how his crazy father hit the roof when he came out the closet and then beat the shit out of his first lover" My confusion must have still be evident on my face because Kip continued to explain whatever the hell he was talking about.

"Come on Brian don't try and tell me you didn't set him up to it? The little prick actually threatened me saying he would tell his dad all about me unless I dropped the case against you. Now why the fuck would he say that if he wasn't acting as your little lap dog?"

I barely had time to make sense of what Kip was saying when Melanie summed it all up in one word.

"Justin"

I heard some collective gasps as everyone finally caught on to what had just been revealed.

Kip was obviously confused by our reaction and desperate to make his exit, he turned to leave but not before saying "Whatever the fuck his name is, both of you stay the hell away from me in future"

"Don't worry he will" Mikey shouted conveniently excluding Justin from his response. I was still lost in the realisation of what I had just discovered.

"I can't believe Justin did that, Brian did you know about this?" I looked up when Lindsay spoke and saw that everyone was staring at me.

"Of course I didn't know, anyway what the fuck does it matter?" I wanted to avoid any further questions and get the hell out of there but I knew what a challenge that would be.

"What the hell do you mean, what the fuck does it matter? That kid saved your ass and you never even said thank you" Oh good, Ted was getting involved.

"How was I supposed to thank him when I didn't even know what he had done? Smart ass! And anyway he probably only did it to get his dick sucked! I was just an afterthought"

Even to me that sounded pathetic and Melanie was first to call me on it.

"Oh come on Brian, don't play stupid it doesn't suit you. I kept wondering over and over again why the case was just dropped especially when it was so strong and looked like it was going to go in his favour, why would he suddenly just drop it? All I was left with was the assumption that the asshole had suddenly developed a conscience but guys who wrongly accuse people in the first place don't usually know what the word conscience means let alone possess one. So it was Justin the little shit, why didn't he tell anyone?" Melanie stole the words right out of my mouth, why the fuck hadn't he told me?

"Anyway it's been a pleasure as always but I have places to go and more important people to see"

I stood up to leave, hoping to make a clean break. No such luck.

"You're not going to say anything to him are you? Even now that you know, you're still not going to thank him." That's what I love about Emmett, he never yells or name calls he just goes straight to the guilt, making you feel an inch tall. However on this occasion he was wrong, I plan on saying a hell of a lot to that little twot and if I'm in very good mood then I might throw a thank you in there somewhere but he's going to have to fucking sing for it.

I stormed out the diner and was suddenly fuming. Why hadn't he told me what he was planning to do? He knew how stressed out I was during that ordeal and he didn't say a fucking thing. He even acted surprised when I told him the case was dropped. Ok so I'm pleased he did it, he saved my career so yes I'm grateful to him to an extent but I don't like how he went about it and I sure as hell don't appreciate being kept in the dark!

I was never any good at waiting and suddenly wanted the answers to all my questions right now. I glanced at my watch and saw that it was 11am on a Sunday, he would probably still be asleep. I'd heard that he was living with Daphne now and she was also probably still lazing around. Fuck. I had no intention of having this conversation in front of an audience.

I whipped out my phone to text Justin.

_"Come to my loft at midday. We need to talk."_

Less than a minute later my phone beeped, I guess he wasn't asleep.

_"Ask me nicely! : )"_

I stopped walking as I read the text and a smile forced its way onto my face. Damn him. Only Justin could make me smile or laugh when I'm this angry. I was also surprised by the tone of his message, the last time we spoke I was hideous to him. I realised shamefully that he was probably used to being treated like that by me and the realisation left a bad taste in my mouth. Anyway even if he had been angry, Justin never held onto to anger or hate it's not who he is, he's fucking happiness personified. I laughed slightly; Justin really was a sickening ray of Sunshine, I typed another text:

_"Just get your ass to my loft by midday….. please."_

I shook my head to try and get rid of my smiles, now where the fuck did I hide all my anger?

I was glad I only had an hour to wait, I was constantly jumping through different emotions. I was consistently angry, then I reminded myself that I should express some gratitude to the kid and then I felt annoyed that he had kept it from me, then I felt bad about the way I had treated him the night before last. I felt a wave of relief and anticipation when I heard a knock on the door at 12 on the dot.

Seeing his face did nothing to control my emotions, I wanted to slap him across the face and kiss him in the same breath.

I stepped aside to allow him to walk through the door "Come in"

"Have you been drinking?" Justin asked startling me, I followed his gaze to the empty tumbler on the kitchen table. Shit I had meant to get rid of that, it was one drink to calm me down, although Jim didn't have much luck controlling my emotions either.

"Yes Sunshine, I felt like a drink so I had one, is that a problem?" Jesus Christ! We were bickering before we have even gotten round to the main topic of discussion.

"Not at all Brian, knock yourself out. So to what do I owe the pleasure of your brief but demanding text?" OK straight to the point, here goes.

"I was thinking earlier about Kip Thomas at work, you remember him? He was the guy that accused me of sexual harassment when it was clear he wouldn't get a free ride up the career ladder."

I saw Justin shift uncomfortably on his feet but decided to continue.

"I was thinking how strange it was that he just dropped the case, poof! Just like that! With no explanation or reason, it was all moving in his favour, I was as good as fired. You must remember all this? I was a fucking mess that week but then it was all over like Magic. Why would he just give up when he was winning the case, any ideas Justin?"

I watched a brief look of surprise flash across his face and then he looked calm and collected, I decided it was time for another drink.

"Want one?" I gestured the bottle in Justin's direction.

"No thanks, midday is a little too early for me to start"

"Well some days I need an early start, So sunshine back to our little discussion any ideas?"

"Why are you asking? You obviously already know that I asked him to drop the case or you wouldn't have ordered me round here and started ranting about it. What I can't understand is why you seem so angry about it, it all worked out didn't it? So why the fuck are you so angry?"

I stopped pacing the room and starred at my former lover, he looked uncomfortable, confused and completely beautiful.

_Why am I so angry?_ Justin had done a good deed so why do I feel so hostile towards him?

Maybe I don't like having my ass saved by someone who walked out on me. Technically Justin & I were not together at the time but we were partners in a way, closer than we are now that's for sure. Do I feel resentful about having to be grateful to someone who left me? That now I feel I owe Justin a debt and paying it back might prove difficult when it's hard to even be around him.

God I'm shallow, I'd rather I'd been fired and lost everything than thank a man that did nothing wrong other than wanting to be with a man who loved him. I resolved to try and calm down and talk to Justin rationally, I still wanted answers.

"I'm not angry, I'm just pissed that you never told me"

"What would I gain from telling you? You would just have assumed that I did it to please you and to get a thank you from you. I've never actually studied the 'Brain Kinney handbook of Life' but I can imagine that Thank you is on the same list as sorry, another word that you think is Bullshit"

"You think I wouldn't thank someone who helped me? Do you really think so little of me?"

"Ha! I wish I did! ...I'm not saying you're not capable of showing gratitude I just meant that you don't like being in people's debt, it means that you had a weakness and someone helped you out and you hate not being in control of every little detail. Anyway I didn't do it for your gratitude."

"Then why the fuck did you do it if you didn't want the glory of saving my ass?!" When had I started shouting? Justin's face was red with anger.

"I did it for you!" He screamed at me.

"You just said you didn't do it for me, make your fucking mind up!" We were getting nowhere.

"I did it for you NOT for you to be grateful to me. Jesus Brian you had already done so much for me, you helped me become what I knew inside I had always been, you taught be how to accept what and I am and be confident in myself, you were there for me when my dad disowned me, you came looking for me in New York…. Granted I think you were looking for your credit card more than me but still you came you didn't send the police. I was a fucked up kid scared of his own skin before I met you and I probably still would be if it hadn't been for you. I already owed you so much and that was before everything you did for me after I got my head smashed in. When I heard what that guy in your office was saying about you, I thought 'this is my chance to help Brian, to finally do something for him'. I didn't care if you knew or not, it just felt so good to give something back"

I got lost in his words, the way he spoke about me, he made me out to be some sort of saint and I was suddenly angry again.

"If I was so amazing and you owed me so much then why the fuck did you leave me?" Shit! That wasn't what I was meant to say.

Justin laughed a nasty little laugh and I was hit with the mixed emotions again of wiping that smug laugh right off his face and taking him roughly from behind.

"Now we are getting somewhere, at least now I know why you're so angry"

"I'm not angry about you leaving me"

"God you are exhausting! Just admit it, I hurt you when I left. The world won't collapse if you tell the truth, your balls won't magically break just because you admit that you actually give a shit about someone. Come on Brian! There's no one here but us, your reputation for being a heartless stud will remain intact. Just be honest with me for once in your life just so I know what it feels like."

"Fine I was a little pissed that you left" He laughed again and took a step towards me.

"You don't even have the balls to man up even once do you? How can you call yourself a legacy when you can't even be honest with yourself? Your mission was to make me into the best homosexual I could be, well I believe a strong attribute for that would be knowing yourself and how you feel and not giving a fuck who knows about it or what anyone else thinks. I'll ask you again, how did you feel when I left?"

I remained silent, I wasn't going there.

"How did you feel?" Justin spoke slowly and his calm voice made me nervous, I felt more in control when we were shouting.

"Leave it" I threatened.

_"How did you fucking feel?!" _Justin shouted in my face causing me to snap_._

_"It fucking killed me!" _I screamed back. I suddenly froze and so did he. "Are you happy now? Does it feel good to know that I missed you? Do you get off knowing that I couldn't sleep for weeks thinking about you in _his_ bed? Have you got everything you wanted from this little confrontation?"

"You asked for this confrontation not me and no of course I'm not happy"

All of a sudden I felt exhausted "I think you should leave"

"No"

I looked into those stubborn blue eyes and considered throwing him out the door.

"I think we have pretty much covered everything" I sighed and then suddenly he's there right in front of me and I feel so tired that I no longer what to smack him or push him I just want to hold him.

He must notice my weakness and places his hand against my cheek, I close my eyes and relax into it. I feel him hesitate, not sure what to do next, eventually he speaks,

"I never wanted to cause you pain. I meant what I said I was so grateful for everything you had done for me but even after the bashing I felt disposable somehow, like if you took me out and replaced me with someone else you wouldn't even notice. You came home every night and only approached me to kiss me or fuck me, never to just talk to me, we spoke in bed sure but I think that was only because you couldn't be bothered to get up straight away. I was making so many changes to the way I wanted to live my life so that I could be with you because you were worth it but you wouldn't change a thing. I would never have asked for monogamy, I'm not an idiot but you knew I didn't share your views on birthdays, would it have been so hard to buy me a frigging chocolate bar?"

I laughed and wrapped my arms around him. He squeezed me tightly and it felt so natural having him in my arms.

"I did change" I whispered in his ear. He pulled away from my embrace and looked at me questioningly.

"Guys are just walking fucks to me, one time tricks. Sometimes if a guy was really good and I see him around then I might go back for seconds but I have never slept with the same guy three times. I don't get to know the tricks and I never look back. Mikey, Emmett and Ted are the only exceptions to this. When you come along, it threw me through a fucking loop. After our second fuck you just wouldn't go away, no matter what I did or said you wouldn't leave me alone and what was more confusing for me was that I didn't want you to. This is my loft, my safe haven from the outside world and it's the only place I can truly relax. The second I have finished with a trick, I want him gone, even after Mikey has been here all night I find myself wanting to be alone but I have let you actually move in with me... _twice_. Do you have any idea what a fucking big deal that was for me?"

I look at Justin's face and see that he is drinking my words in, he seems entranced. I don't want to stop talking, I need to say this.

"The night you got bashed I ... well I've never experienced anything like that in my life, I felt like I was dying it hurt so much. I don't get close to people because then they can fuck you over and hurt you, I'm not letting anyone hurt me. I can love Mikey he's safe, he will never hurt me and even if he did it would be because I deserved it. You pushed your way into my life and then fucked with me twice, I felt like I had lost you after the bashing and then you walked out on me to be with Ethan."

I felt my anger returning. "So don't say I haven't changed anything because my whole fucking world had been turned upside down, I let you in and allowed myself to be happy and then you walked out because I wouldn't buy you chocolates for your birthday?"

"It wasn't just that! I felt like I meant nothing to you"

"That's fucking bullocks and you know it"

"Then why didn't you want me when I practically threw myself at you the other night?"

I cringed again as I remembered what I had said to him.

"You must have known how hard it was for me to turn you down like that"

"Oh yes you really looked like you were struggling, you were just leaving to service at trick weren't you"

"If you must know, no I wasn't I lied because I didn't want to fuck you because once I fucked you then you would just fuck me over….. again!"

"The bashing was hardly my fault! And by the way if my getting bashed in the head hurt you so much then why the hell didn't you come and visit me in the hospital even once?"

"I was there every fucking night!" I spat. Shit I had lost my temper again. Fuck it "I watched you sleep, I spoke to the nurses about your progress and I stayed with you every night until they kicked me out"

"Why the fuck would you do that?" Justin screamed at me, his eyes brimming with tears.

"Because I fucking Love You!"

I don't know how it happened but within seconds he was in my arms and kissing me passionately. I could taste the salt on his lips from his tears that he had allowed to fall. He tasted so good and he felt even better. Fuck I had missed this.

We were ripping each other's clothes off as we tried to head in the general direction of the bedroom. We practically fell up the steps to my room but somehow managed to land on the bed.

I was so hungry for him I wanted to be everywhere at once, kissing him all over, then the passion took over and I was lost doing my favourite activity with the one I loved.

As we laid there blissfully happy and content I felt my young lover stir beside me.

"Brian" He whispered.

"Yes" I replied turning my head to face him.

"I love you too" He smirked.

"Fuck you" I said affectionately as he leaned forward to kiss me on the lips.

I suddenly remembered that there was still one thing I had to do "Justin?"

"Yes" He replied sleepily.

"Thank you for saving my ass" He smiled my favourite sunshine smile.

"Well it was an ass worth saving"

_Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed it._


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